On November 2nd I will have been a mother for 6 months. Having a baby is even better than I ever hoped or imagined it would be, and harder! Haha. I love it, though! As a mom, one must learn to set aside their preconceived notions and ideas for motherhood (like I had mentioned in my last entry) and also lower the expectations for oneself. Because if you don't you (and yes, I mean YOU) will go crazy! (And by "you", I really mean ME). ;)
During the week I am, in essence, a mother to twins. One of the twins is just a little more advanced than the other. (That would be my sweet little Fisher Face who just turned 1 on Saturday!) I try to imagine what life would be like if I ACTUALLY had twins and I know it would be much more difficult! I only have Fisher about 45 or less hours a week....having the 2nd twin would be a 24/7 job. So, I'm thankful I really only have one child at this point in my life. I've discovered that I'm not good at being productive after a night of waking up 3-6 times. I would like to think that I am, but I'm not. (I mean, take right now for instance! I SHOULD be folding that laundry that's draped over the couch, but instead I'm blogging!). Some days, both babies nap at the same time which gives me a precious hour, give or take, of time "alone". My brain tells me to get some chores done, but my body tells me to slack off or take a nap. I tend to listen to my body more than my brain - which is sometimes a good thing. :)
So what have I learned lately? I've learned to accept the fact that the laundry, the dishes, the projects, the bills to pay, the mail to sort, the floor to vacuum, the bath tub to clean and the bed to make will ALWAYS be there and really won't ever change or "grow up". I will always have chores to do. My house will never be as clean as I would like it to be. My projects will always take 10 times longer to finish because I have 2 babies to care for. But guess what/who will change and "grow up" right before my eyes, every day?? My son. My sweet little baby boy, Julian! He's nearly 6 months old. He's more than doubled his birth weight (8lbs 2oz at birth and now 19lbs 5oz at 6 months) and has added more than 7 inches to his height. He is sitting up, rolling over both ways, reaching for his mommy, drinking from a sippy cup, eating big people food, blowing raspberries, scooting around on his belly, learning all the different sounds and levels of noise his voice makes and simply GROWING UP.
My house may not be spotless - far from it, in fact - but I'm not missing out of watching my son grow and learn every minute of the day. I wouldn't change that for the world. I have to tell myself "it's okay" to ignore the chores in favor of sitting on the ground playing with Julian. Or, "it's okay" to not fix my hair or makeup in order to gain more time cuddling with my baby.
So I guess that's what I've learned - that apart from God and my husband, my son is the most important person in my life and nothing else matters! It's true and I ain't ashamed to admit that. :)
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